Yesterday there was a very interesting experience with the Taxi Driver on the way back home from the office in Dubai. I was silent when my collegeue started a converstaion with the taxi driver. The guy (lets call him Mr. X) was curious to know what we were doing. So he was told we are into training on personal excellence, helping people change their attitudes, behaviors etc.
Then Mr. X started talking about how he stopped procrastination and started exercising every day in the morning and how he has been consistently doing it for the last 6 months. I was happy for him and then he said he smokes 4 cigarrates a day. Well I was wondering for a moment if I need to talk this guy and make him quit smoking. I did not have much time either as I was nearing my place. But the previous sentence of his gave me confidence that he will be committed if the change comes from within. So with that in mind I decided to give my few mins to change his behavior!

What drives people are 2 things, Pain and Pleasure. With smoking the Pleasure component is so high that unless its negated with something so painful will not help him come out of the habit. Most drivers in Dubai come here with the intention of giving the best for the family. So is Mr. X, and he has 2 children, a 5 year old boy and a 3 month old girl. So I had my trump card to play with and started asking him how will it be if he orphaned his children (I know this is quite raw but I had to give him a painful experience).
He was shaken for a second. Becuase he was in blaming the govenment, stating that why are allowing smoking when they are not allowing drugs. So I simply asked him, ‘The government also does not allow suicide and still people do, so it lies in individuals to define whats right and whats not! I wanted to scare him a little more on the consequneces of smoking, and then told him if knew how the lungs look like? He was not sure, so picked my phone and drew the lungs with holes in it. I told him in normal lungs there are no holes and since he is burning them down with smoke, a few months later that how his lungs will be. All this shook him a little and then decided to push him more!

My collegeue then said stop it now! Well thats one big challenge many people face! Not taking Action on time. My collegeue was really pushing him to stop now! Now that was a challenge for me to make him accept the change instantly. Thats when I believe that the Brain works at a great speed if you want to! So I just gave him a metphor to keep him in a fix. Tomorrow never happens.

NLP always told me this, Speak in the others persons language. The example I gave him was this. Assume that your are driving and see a truck crossing and what do you at that moment? So here is a conversation that we had (Mr. X - The Driver, PS - Praveen Sherman)

Mr. X - I apply the brakes
PS - and how quickly
Mr. X - Immediately
PS - what would happen if you do it after 5 mins
Mr. X - an accident and crash
PS - and?
Mr. X - probably even die
PS - So what do you stop smoking? Now or later?

So I was expecting the next one. How about reducing it to one or two? So I continued the conversation

PS - Shall I give you some few drops of poison? Just half a spoon?
Mr. X - Oh no!
PS - So coming back to the same thing, if you see a truck when you do brake?
Mr. X - immediately
PS - so what happens if you brake only half? Do not brake fully, so what are the consequnces
Mr. X - crash and accident.

By this time I felt that I had almost won him and made him undergo that split second choice. Remember Changes always happens in a Heart Beat!

PS - Hold the Brakes now and full! And if you have a cigaratte now give it to me! (not for me, but to throw it out :))

So he handed over one to me, I did felt good at that moment for making a difference in this guy. Pray for this guy for him to stop smoking for ever. I told him to call his wife and tell her that he has stopped. That will give him a better push!

A request to all those who smoke, you know what to do Wishing you all a wonderful 2010!

This is a great way to start a New Year! I am gifted to have helped him and I am sure more in the future! Welcome 2010!