Yesterday there was a very interesting experience with the Taxi Driver on the way back home from the office in Dubai. I was silent when my collegeue started a converstaion with the taxi driver. The guy (lets call him Mr. X) was curious to know what we were doing. So he was told we are into training on personal excellence, helping people change their attitudes, behaviors etc.
Then Mr. X started talking about how he stopped procrastination and started exercising every day in the morning and how he has been consistently doing it for the last 6 months. I was happy for him and then he said he smokes 4 cigarrates a day. Well I was wondering for a moment if I need to talk this guy and make him quit smoking. I did not have much time either as I was nearing my place. But the previous sentence of his gave me confidence that he will be committed if the change comes from within. So with that in mind I decided to give my few mins to change his behavior!

What drives people are 2 things, Pain and Pleasure. With smoking the Pleasure component is so high that unless its negated with something so painful will not help him come out of the habit. Most drivers in Dubai come here with the intention of giving the best for the family. So is Mr. X, and he has 2 children, a 5 year old boy and a 3 month old girl. So I had my trump card to play with and started asking him how will it be if he orphaned his children (I know this is quite raw but I had to give him a painful experience).
He was shaken for a second. Becuase he was in blaming the govenment, stating that why are allowing smoking when they are not allowing drugs. So I simply asked him, ‘The government also does not allow suicide and still people do, so it lies in individuals to define whats right and whats not! I wanted to scare him a little more on the consequneces of smoking, and then told him if knew how the lungs look like? He was not sure, so picked my phone and drew the lungs with holes in it. I told him in normal lungs there are no holes and since he is burning them down with smoke, a few months later that how his lungs will be. All this shook him a little and then decided to push him more!

My collegeue then said stop it now! Well thats one big challenge many people face! Not taking Action on time. My collegeue was really pushing him to stop now! Now that was a challenge for me to make him accept the change instantly. Thats when I believe that the Brain works at a great speed if you want to! So I just gave him a metphor to keep him in a fix. Tomorrow never happens.

NLP always told me this, Speak in the others persons language. The example I gave him was this. Assume that your are driving and see a truck crossing and what do you at that moment? So here is a conversation that we had (Mr. X - The Driver, PS - Praveen Sherman)

Mr. X - I apply the brakes
PS - and how quickly
Mr. X - Immediately
PS - what would happen if you do it after 5 mins
Mr. X - an accident and crash
PS - and?
Mr. X - probably even die
PS - So what do you stop smoking? Now or later?

So I was expecting the next one. How about reducing it to one or two? So I continued the conversation

PS - Shall I give you some few drops of poison? Just half a spoon?
Mr. X - Oh no!
PS - So coming back to the same thing, if you see a truck when you do brake?
Mr. X - immediately
PS - so what happens if you brake only half? Do not brake fully, so what are the consequnces
Mr. X - crash and accident.

By this time I felt that I had almost won him and made him undergo that split second choice. Remember Changes always happens in a Heart Beat!

PS - Hold the Brakes now and full! And if you have a cigaratte now give it to me! (not for me, but to throw it out :))

So he handed over one to me, I did felt good at that moment for making a difference in this guy. Pray for this guy for him to stop smoking for ever. I told him to call his wife and tell her that he has stopped. That will give him a better push!

A request to all those who smoke, you know what to do Wishing you all a wonderful 2010!

This is a great way to start a New Year! I am gifted to have helped him and I am sure more in the future! Welcome 2010!

Do you need pills to handle depression? I read an article in a newspaper recently which said the sales of Anti-Depressant pills have shot up? Surprising because people treat this financial turmoil in very different ways. They feel depressed because of huge financial loses and use these pills to feel better. Read article here.. http://tinyurl.com/58u2wm

Can these pills really make you feel better? I really don’t know, but the fact is that you don’t need pills to feel better. As a matter of fact you really don’t need reason to feel better. This moment right now can you feel better?

I always say to people during my training program is this

“The only reason why you must feel happy is that you are able to read this or hear something happening and feel in a certain way”. You are so gifted to have what you have and that’s a good enough reason to feel happy.

But people say, “Praveen I have lost money, and how do expect me to now feel depressed?”. Absolutely right! You must feel depressed but my question is that will taking pills be the solution. The result of eating anti-depressants or even smoking or drinking is “More depressed”. You will feel down, sad and depressed and because of that eat pills and then feel more bad because you are eating pills for not getting depressed which means that you are fighting depression.

Depression is just a State of Mind and you can control it. I know you will feel bad about the events of your loss. But it cannot be avoided. Respond in a useful way so that your life will be in better control of yourself. Instead of focusing on how life will be because of your loss, start focusing on how you want life to be. That will make you come out of depression will motivate you and make you perform better.

Please do not pop pills because they have other effects in your brain.

As I write I feel great and also different. This is the first time ever a Phobia Cure Event, that too Live is happening in the country, the whole of Asia! Cannot believe it myself. I still keep pinching myself to check if this is true and it is.

I am using all the skills of NLP, Neuro Linguistic Programming that I have learnt to make this event a Grand Success!

What is this event all about?Simple, Phobia is Fear multiplied several times. What stops people today is fear! That’s the biggest show stopper today for Success. Can you overcome it? I strongly believe that “Anything is possible, it is the question of Right Strategy”.

Over a period of time people have various fears and they stamp themselves and give a new negative identity, “I have fear and so I am not confident”. Unfortunate that this stretches to extremes and hence they do not do the best in their area of Life! Can someone Change this? Sure yes and thats why I want to do this event.

I want people to understand the true capabilities what each carry.This event is to make people understand that they can come out of any troubles or challenges and achieve the best in life.

So as you are reading this do call my office at +91-44-4215 5353 and talk to Prema for your entry passes.I would love to have with the positive energy that will flow to make this event the best experience for each and everyone.

Catch a Write up in The Hindu Today on the event! Click here

The No Tobacco Day is observed every 31st of May during which time the people around the world, government, organizations and others, make people realize that the ill effects of smoking and make them refrain from smoking.

I was reading today’s paper in Dubai, which bans smoking or selling of tobacco for under 20’s. Interestingly the Government plans what we must do. More out of concern I guess!

At 20 you are not even supposed to use tobacco anywhere (not just 20 but at any age) and there is someone who is refraining from doing so. Don’t we know that logically we are not supposed to do this?

And still people do what they want to do. Its because they “WANT” it.  Why? Because people believe the Smoking can give them some relief from stress, of make them look cool and so on. But unfortunate that they do not realize the amount of chemical reactions that take place inside which acts weird.

Is it not that people do not know they must not smoke, they still do it because they have an identity which says “you are a smoker”.  Unless the identity is changed it becomes very difficult for anyone to change the behavior or a habit. Patterns are also formed because of identity of self.

Creating an identity is nothing much except that you start living what you want, rather force yourself and be what you want and slowly your subconscious begins to believe you are so and will support and guide you.

So lets plan our own Life before someone else does it for us.

I don’t know how indebted I will be to these people who just finished the Born To Win Program the Born to Win 13 from OnlySuccess. Once again it was a great sharing the stage with Vidya! My CEO. He was rocking on stage as usual I was training people on some of the most advanced techniques of NLP, Neuro Linguistic Programming.

People walked bare foot on fire burning at 1200 Deg Fahrenheit. What was more exciting was this Born To Win on Day 1 we had the kids of the Leadership Academy walk on fire! Cool it was. The youngest to walk on fire was a 9 year old girl!! Wow!! I was there next to girl, and she dint even for a second show any signs of fear what so ever.

The energy was outrageous and the way the coaches motivated the participants was excellent. This was definitely one of the best Born To Win programs that I have conducted. The emails I have received after the program from the participants really gives me utmost satisfaction because they expressed their gratitude, showed their love and care and decided Life Will Never Be the Same.

Hats off to everyone. I am sure that it will be a great journey ahead for everyone of you.

Live With Passion